Entries Tagged as 'Charlotte'

I honestly have no idea what this is

January 31st, 2013 · No Comments

I was on the Creative Loafing site the other day, as one is when one wants to understand the width and breadth of life in Charlotte. Or when you want to know what strip club has a discount. And what should I see? These ads.



Does this mean that Charlotte is getting a Dollywood? Is Dollywood going to replace Carowinds? Is Dollywood a travelling show? Is Dollywood a new dining experience with singing, dancing people? Also, why is the only black person in this ad not only in the back, but completely unseeable?



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Tags: Charlotte · Wisdom of OddBot

Come read our blog, then read this entirely seperate blog

January 22nd, 2013 · No Comments

Hello loyal Robot…. whatever-our-group’s-name-is readers,

We love that you come to read our blog. It’s one of our favorite things… except for sex and booze and money and money for sex and booze and video games and making people think that we like foie gras. But now, we’re going to make you stop reading our blog for a minute and go read other blogs. You see, our friend Sean, the salt-and-pepper hair support group member and incidentally the joker who dragged this weird mix of horrible people together to for the conjoined monster that is Robot…. whatever-our-group’s-name-is, you see Sean is a blogger-for-a-day with Charlotte Magazine. I’ve been told that is like being elected president, only if you are shot, no one will jump in front of a bullet for you.

So you should go read his blog-for-a-day and share your happiness with him through the comments.



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Tags: Charlotte · General

Robot Johnson’s 5th Anniversary Party

December 6th, 2012 · No Comments

Hey, folks. We’ve been around Charlotte doing comedy for the last 5 years and we’ve really come far. We used to perform in the back of a crappy bar and now we’re performing in the back of a much nicer bar. Ah, progress.

We’re going to celebrate our anniversary at 10pm this Friday at Roux in NoDa with a few drinks and some conversation with the folks that would like to come out and join us. We’re not performing or anything, just celebrating and we’d love to have you come out and join us.

Here’s the FB invite, if you’re so inclined.



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Tags: Charlotte

Introducing Democracy 2.0

November 6th, 2012 · No Comments

I feel like I don’t even know you anymore, democracy. We used to be so close. We had a great run, don’t get me wrong. Remember when we went to Florida and got lost? Or when we had that four-day peyote trip with Ross Perot?

Good times.

But we’re more than 200 years into this experiment, and I have to be honest with you: you’re boring.  You’re a PBS special on Dutch Elm disease. You’re the technical awards at the Oscars. You’re a lettuce fart in locked car.

If we’re going to keep seeing each other we need to spice up our relationship. No more going to bed with the prettiest guy with the nicest hair.  When we first started going steady you would only talk to white guys with land. Now every Tom, Debrickashaw and Jaunita gets to bend your ear.

We need a new way of doing things. If the 2012 Bataan Death March has taught us anything, we are falling behind the times. We need a relationship for the 21st century. People want something sexy, something intriguing, something that is going to make them take notice. A ruling ideology that’s a freak in the sheets and a lady in the streets.

Let’s boost our q-rating. And I think I’ve found out how we save this republic of ours.

May I present you to our future: “1600,” the world’s first democracy reality show.

Every four years presidential candidates will be forced to participate in a “Fear Factor” style competition to determine who will lead us.

The show will be set at the Thunderdome. Each week, candidates will be forced to vie for your vote by humiliating themselves and proving their love of This republic. Think about the ratings when we lock Michelle Obama in the scorpion helmet and make Barack Obama eat 30 rotten pig penises in less than five minutes to get the pad lock combination. Throw Mitt Romney into the Sarlaac pit to square off against fifty angry wolverines with nothing but his wits and magic underwear.

What better way for a president to prove he loves us. Look at how many women Flavor Flav got to date him using this model, and that guy is dog shit piled 5 feet 3 inches high, and he has whores aplenty.

No more of this “one man, one vote” nonsense, either. And no more having to register to vote for that matter. No more driving 10 minutes to a polling place and waiting your turn behind that crazy old lady that somehow reeks of cat pee but hasn’t owned a living cat in more than a decade.

Why can’t we text our votes? Or better yet, let’s sext our votes from our couches at home.

I have a raging electorate just thinking about this plan.

After all the sexts have been cast and counted we’ll present the winner with the keys to the White House. That’s followed by a slow motion capture of the winner climbing the bloodied steps passed those marble, Athenian columns as a Queen song blares out and F-15s screech across the morning sky.

Cut to the loser, sucking eggs on the front lawn before secret service agents beat the living hell out of him and his family.

Cut. Print. Liberty!


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Tags: Charlotte · Timely Pop Culture

A weekend of charity and booze to benefit a tramp

October 11th, 2012 · No Comments

A few weeks back, a friend of our show, Austin Caine, lost his abode in a fire (link to the WCNC story about the apartment fire). He’s been coming to our shows for years and doing everything from recording audio of our show to doing our headshots and a ton of stuff in between.

Awwww, look at that lil homeless scamp!
He’s immensely scampy! And terribly homeless!

Being problem solvers and notable drunks, Zaq Rogers (one of the RoJo cast members) and some of Austin’s other friends leapt into action! Leap is a bit of an exageration due to the poor physical fitness regimine of most artsy folks, but they moved faster than normal into action! There are a couple of charity events going on this weekend to help the cause. (I apologize in advance for linking to Facebook to coordinate these things, but that’s how the future goes)

  • Friday 10/12: Iron Bartender (at Wine Up)
    Four Charlotte are bartenders will compete in two head-to-head matchups, with the winner of each squaring off in the final, for a total of three rounds. A secret ingredient will be chosen before each round, and the bartenders will have ten minutes to create a drink using that ingredient. The drinks will then be judged by our celebrity panel, which includes:
    ZAQ ROGERS of Robot Johnson & Iron Cordoba Events
    BIG MAMMA D of Big Mamma’s House of Burlesque!
  • Saturday 10/13: Out of the Ashes Benefit Show (at the Chop Shop)
    Ric Evans
    Sinners & Saints
    Your Dirty Habit
    Robot Johnson
    Also there will be a number of raffled items (check out the link for the full list)

If you’re so inclined, you can always donate directly.


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Tags: Charlotte